I am faced with a similar situation. The Parallels Video Adapter appears to be inferior than a regular installation of the driver. When I looked at the Windows Experience Index I saw that graphics receives a miserable 1.9 and gaming graphics gets a pathetic 1.0. Prior to using Parallels Desktop 4.0 for Mac I used Bootcamp which had a similar issue detecting the display adapter for the nVidia 9400M video card. That improved the graphics to what I recall in the upper 4 to 5 range, instead of those lousy numbers from the Parallels Video Adapter.
Unfortunately, I have tried many methods of installing the nVidia 9400M video card.
1) I disabled the driver and tried to manually install the driver using the file by nVidia.
2) I uninstalled the driver but that only reinstalled the adapter once I turned it on.
3) I uninstalled and deleted the driver and that gave it a somewhat bootcamp situation where it called it a Standard VGA Adapter if I recall.
4) Searched these forums about ambiguous video card problems and how they were resolved (probably tried 2 methods with no success).
At the moment I specified the search to that specific driver, the nVidia 9400M video card, and found this recent entry. I hope you can assist us with this problem. The sooner would help provide initiative for this problem. Thank you.