Totally agree, there is no direction from the Parallels team as to how to correctly set up Smart Guard. This is unclear as to if it should be set to exclude back ups or not once Smart Guard is enabled.
https://kb.parallels.com/8827
I have it working now, and I *believe* I have it set up correctly, and thought i'd detail my use case. Time Machine was backing up the entire VM with every single back up -50 GB each hour, and it chewed through 2TB of my 8 TB Time Machine back up drive in a a week.
To fix this, I successfully enabled Smart Guard. Then quit Parallels and forced Time Machine to "back up now". The first time after enabling, TM did another "full" VM back up of 50GB. But once that first one was done, I forced it to do another "back up now" and this one was 75MB and super fast. Each Time Machine back up after that is also just a super fast incremental back up. You can verify that it's working by "entering" Time Machine and navigating to all the VM files.
In terms of a traditional back up (not Time Machine) that is the one that needs to be done with the VM closed. I use Super Dupe (on a separate external HD) and have it auto run in the middle of the night when I have the VM shut down. Seems to be working fine.
I *no not* have the VM excluded from Time Machine in the Parallels preferences. My understanding is that it must be included in order for Smart Guard to work - something that is unclear from the docs.
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